Thursday, February 10, 2011

ask;finq

I almost finished the report.  I haven't written a complete one in far too long.  I can never manage to ever get them finished anymore, even if I spend a good amount of time on them.  I was pretty happy with this one though, as it was going to do some good for my grade.  Then, only to realize as I got to school, I had left my flash drive with the report on it at home and it was due at that moment.  No matter what, at that point it was going to be a day late, which means a 10 % penalty.  Fuck'n shit balls.  This is the second time I've taken this class.  The last time I took it, I worked extremely hard on the papers, but I was also a drug addict and wasn't thinking straight, mostly due to dehydration and malnourishment caused by being in the adderal zone.  You almost couldn't stop me from studying, but I didn't remember much because i was not treating myself well.

Things are starting to look grim for this class again, but I know there is still hope as there are still four more papers left to write and they are worth more points than the previous three.  If I fail this class again, I think I will call it quits, even if I am this close to the end.  I'm beginning to think that no one will higher me anyways.  I was supposed to graduate about six months ago.  Now I'm supposed to graduate in about 2 months and haven't put in the slightest bit of effort to finding a job or looking at grad schools or anything related to post graduation stuff.  I can't even get myself to get a job and I'm so broke right now.  Fortunately, I have some help, but I need to fucking quit this stupid ass childish bullshit and grow up.  I don't know what has happened to me.  Is there any hope left anymore?

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